I recently took my eight-year-old daughter to a backyard birthday party with amenities including a foam machine, trampoline, pop-up waterslide, a step-and-repeat, and a few grazing pet goats. I felt both awed and deeply inadequate as a mother, even as I accepted a High Noon and headed for the glitter tattoo station. In our time of modern super-parenthood—in all of its pitfalls—it isn’t enough to simply be brave enough to open one’s home to children and feed them pizza; the standard, alas, is throwing birthday parties with the vigor of Mindy Weiss herself. In this pursuit, we can and should all go home now, because Kim Kardashian has already won.
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In addition to her many other titles, after this weekend, history will remember Kardashian as the host of Camp North, a rustic, mountain-themed glamping extravaganza in honor of her eldest daughter, North West, turning nine. I believe my own ninth birthday took place at a Long Island rollerskating rink named United Skates of America. According to a picturesque recap on Kardashian’s Instagram carousel, North’s, by contrast, entailed transportation on Kardashian’s cashmere-lined private jet, Kim Air, to scenic Wyoming with Kourtney Kardashian’s daughter Penelope, and the daughters of Jessica Simpson and Kardashian’s right hand, Tracy Romulus; bespoke deer-printed Camp North pajamas; mini, tartan-lined (indoor) tents for each child; and an itinerary of rafting and ropes courses. It’s a trip that I, a 40-year-old woman, would feel only so lucky to embark upon.
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